Where to from here?

I took the JSDA Series 2 on Monday...for those of you who don't know what it is, its a regulatory test that anyone in finance in Japan has to take and pass. Thats all hunky dory if the test wasn't written with the worst grammar ever seen on the face of the earth with the mere excuse on the front of the test saying "Please do not complain about the English version, this test is meant to be taken in Japanese and wherever there are errors in the English translation the Japanese version will prevail". A little xenophobic are we not Japan? Are we forgetting that foreigners own more than half the value of your stockmarket?

Anyway, it was a nightmare...lucky I can read Japanese and I went back and deciphered some stuff but overall it was a disaster. I studied 4 hours everyday for 2 weeks...that meant leaving work around midnight every night. When I returned to the office the white look on my face conveyed the "that test went horribly badly" look. Worse, is if you fail you have to wait a month to take it again. Being in sales that means I can't talk to clients for a whole month, basically making me redundant...so I went home and repacked my suitcase anticipating the worst. It turns out I passed which is a miracle in itself...must be something to do with it being Passover and me being Jewish...it must!

So where to from here you may ask? Get on the blower and sell some Japanese equity! Am I ready you may ask? I sure as hell better be.

quote from a swedish movie

"We all just want people to take a bit of time to see who we really are, to try to understand us. We just want others to understand that we're just as small as they are in this world."

This sums up my feelings for while now...I think it a beautiful quote.

Rant Rant Rant

Whenever I accomplish something or finally get something I've always wanted I never feel a sense of accomplishment. Its like...ok what do I do now?Where do I go from here?

It feels like I can never enjoy an achievement for what it is. I always have to look for the next goal and the next chance to fail or succeed. One thing though, I'm glad I've learned to do over the last year and a half is how to react to failure. I think this comes with getting knocked down and trying really hard and failing enough times that giving up just doesn't make sense...its the ultimate admission of defeat.

Its like when I started job interviews for grad and intern positions in my 2nd last year of uni. I just couldn't get interviews...mainly thanks to how prestigous the University of Western Australia (we're like 80th in world rankings) is not. But when I did and I finally got the intern that I wanted then the job offer I wanted...it kinda feels like where do I go from here. I just want to start working so I can aim at something again.

I've got the JSDA Series 2 (test to be a stockbroker) in a bit. Failure is not an option...dissapointing the guys who believed in me enough to give me a chance that few others are getting is just not something I want to think about.

My goodness that was disjointed...

RANT OVER

my first post!

I've always wanted to write..but I've never really pursued it. In fact in highschool it was one of the only things I was above average in. Also I think a lot and I think its a good way for me to vent so I don't drive myself crazy letting my thoughts go in tangents that just leave me somewhere I didn't want to be before I started thinking!

Also I met someone recently that kinda helped me understand the romance of writing. Don't try fill in any gaps...I'm very single:)

My first proper post will follow in the next few days...